1. It's time for the Mission Story Slam podcast. It's brought to you by PWP Video. I'm Michael Schweitzheimer. I'm the executive producer at PWP Video, Mission Story Slam, and I am someone who never really got into comic books. Which might be a problem for me today, on this episode, because we have not one but two guests.

First, we have the whole hog winner from our December 3rd slam, where the theme was, It's a Family Affair. Adam Teteris pulled off the rare feat of winning both the judges award and the audience award. But we also have his dear friend, Octavius A. Newman. Together, Adam and Octavius are podcasters in their own right.

with their series, Comic Book Jimtoe. But, I'm going to jump right into Adam's story to explain another connection that they share. I'm an emcee for burlesque shows. Yeah? Has anybody ever been to a burlesque The person laughing up front has been to a burlesque show. Anybody been to a burlesque show before?

Huh? The folks who have never been to a burlesque show, I see you. You didn't applaud because you don't know what that is. And it makes you feel weird. I have a burlesque show next week. It's called Get You a Babe Who Can Do Both. We do TEDx style talks. and striptease, alright? So if you're here tonight and you're thinking something's missing from this formula Wednesday, December 11th, alright?

But I say that all to say is that I'm comfortable generally in front of the microphone but I'm nervous to tell this story I didn't practice this I didn't expect to do this So, in 2016 I became a kidney donor Applause. Um, it actually makes me feel so weird, uh, to talk about this, and that's why I don't generally give this talk very much.

I don't like to center myself when I have this kind of conversation, although I do think it's a very important thing that more people ought to consider, and all people can do. You don't have to be an important person to do this thing. But in 2016, I became A kidney donor. I gave my kidney to a very close friend of mine.

His name is Octavius A. Newman. And Octavius and I met when we worked at the Apple Store on 17th and Walnut way, way, way back. If I sold you something you don't need, you're welcome. We became really close friends. We talked all the time. We talked so much that we started a podcast, as is our God given right.

And one day, as we were getting ready to start our podcast, we were going to record together. Octavius told me that he had some news and he told me that he's been going through some stuff. I could tell, we podcast all the time, I could tell something was up. His energy was low. He told me he had stage four kidney disease and I didn't know how many stages of kidney disease there are.

I did not know what a kidney does. I had not really thought about these things, taking this stuff for granted. Through a lot of conversation. Through finding out what kidneys do and finding out how I can help and finding out how I have the blood type he needs. We went through a series of tests. We became cross matched as it were and October 11th, 2016, I gave him my kidney.

To date, I think it's our best collaboration we've ever been a part of. Um, and what's interesting is when you go through the process They tell you you've got to go through a lot of tests. Cross matching is when you find out that all of your, not just your blood, your cells, everything matches up. And something interesting between Octavius and I is Octavius is a black man, he's in his 40s, he's married, he's a devout Christian.

I am none of those things! And so when we found out, well, we're cross matched, we're a pair, it felt like something special. Something that we did not know immediately. You go through a lot of tests. You go through CT scan. You go through psychiatric tests. You go through a battery of examinations. But one I was not ready for was telling your family.

Because when I told my family that I was going to become a kidney donor and they asked, who for? I had to tell them it was for someone they've never met. They didn't know this person. And suddenly there was a lot of conversations About what I was losing, and for whom. I love my family. They're wonderful.

But understandable. If somebody close to you told you they were doing something big, that you know takes these backsies, they start wondering, well what happens if your brother needs a kidney? Well what happens if family needs What happens? What happens? What happens? And I had a really difficult time having a conversation with my family about this.

Not because they didn't understand Octavius or the decision, but I had this inflection moment. That I never realized we needed to have, which is I finally understood they didn't know who I am anymore. Because as you get older, you grow apart. You go to different places, your career takes you to different spots, you become a different person.

It's natural, it just happens. And rare is the occasion when you have to sit back and examine that and tell your family I'm doing an important thing for a person. You don't know you don't really know who I am We had a long conversation. It was hard. We cried a lot They didn't really get how I could come to this consensus for a person that hadn't been entered Into our family.

Makes sense. I get it. But it's still hard to have that conversation. At the end of the conversation, they understood me a little bit better. I had the opportunity to present myself as I was eight years ago. A different man than the person that they knew when they were raising me. And we weren't talking about loss anymore.

Because at the end of that conversation, and after October 11th, 2016, Octavius became a part of our family. And I Became a part of his and so when we talk about what I did what I gave what I lost I think about what I gained. All right, welcome Adam and Octavius To the mission story slam podcast. Thank you for having us Michael.

Yeah. Yeah happy to be here. Thank you for having me Let's just make this the new episode of comic book junta, right? Welcome to comic book junta. I am your host Octavius A. Newman I am the geek culture philosopher and I'm here with my friend and Uh, personal superhero, Adam, um, just Adam, what you don't know here on time.

Ted is always a J name. Uh, my middle name, middle initial is J. There's always a new J name. I'm telling you, be careful what you ask for here, Michael, because you know, once you, you can't stop that train, not like Spider Man stops that train. You can't stop this train. Yeah. And I have to be careful because I won't know what the hell is on.

Well, you've seen the Superman trailer, right? You've seen that. At least. No. See? What is Okay. Alright. Stop the show. I'm a bad I'm not even good as a filmmaker. I don't watch enough movies. I'm too busy making content to watch a lot. Which is a real lame excuse. Okay. Alright. I'll allow it. But it is It's my truth.

It's a good one. So, alright. Listen. Octavius. I'm very curious. How many How many times have you heard Adam tell a version of this story? Hmm, uh, um, I'm not sure, truly. I mean, it doesn't have to be that count, but is this like It hasn't been that many, because between Adam and I, that's not regular conversation, you know?

It's not like Hey, remember that time you lent me those sneakers? You lent them to me. And now I've used them. We don't talk about it every time we get together. Most of the time, when we talk about it, or when I hear about it, or when it comes up between Adam and I, it's someone else going, Huh, you're Superman?

You know what I mean? And then it's like, yeah, now we have this conversation. But between he and I, it's just like, yo, I got you a Christmas present. You know, that's the most recent text message. Hey, I saw Nosferatu. Do you want to go see it tonight? Accurate. So, all right So I do have to know because I was thinking about this and I know you guys were friends before and you remain friends like did you have to have like a very specific conversation either before after the surgery to kind of make some kind of a deal because Like, I don't know, like if I were you Octavius, I would be like, you're not buying dinner for the rest of your effing life.

Like, I, you know. Yeah, what else should he have said? Yeah, let me know. I didn't say you should have, but like, like I just wouldn't know how to even express my feelings for that kind of a thing. So like, how did you guys deal with that? We were actually recording an episode of Comic Book Junzo. And I, um, was finding out about this stuff going on because I had gotten sick one day.

And I was just sick as in like, man, I don't feel good. And it goes from I don't feel good to maybe we should go to the hospital. And when I go to the hospital, it's like, hey, by the way, you've got stage four kidney disease. And I looked at my wife and I was like, oh, okay. I really didn't know what that meant and I looked at my wife and it was her reaction made me go Oh, what's that mean?

You know and from there my response was like, okay, how do we deal with this? and this there's there's a cut there's a Combination gumbo of naivete and audacity when they were like you have to get a kidney and I was like, oh I can get a kidney Yeah, I can get you a toe dude Somebody gonna give me a kidney and I had no idea what I was saying You know, and I think part of that is kind of how I ended up talking to Adam about it because we were recording comic book Junta or getting ready to and We were in Indy Hall, and I think Adam I don't know if I said this but I was like yo Adam.

What blood type are you? Is that, does that how it, I think, so I think it was something like that casual conversation to be sure. Uh, somebody asked you your blood type, you just say like, ah, Oh, positive why you ask. And I was like, yo, you want to give me a kidney? And he was like, what are you talking about?

And that's basically how the conversation was broached through jokes. But you weren't, you weren't recording at the time. It was before you were recording, right? Cause I did listen to the, um, comic book Jinto episode where you guys dropped the news that you, what, you weren't going to go see a movie that was opening because you had something else planned.

Shin Godzilla. Shin Godzilla was the movie that I had tickets to go see Shin Godzilla, October 11th, 2016. Very important to me as a very big Godzilla fan. And uh, so this is for Adam. This is how the kidney transplant took on the name. We started calling it Shin Godzilla, that it was like a code name. You know, when we talked about Shin Godzilla, we were talking about the transplant.

All right. So I do think, um, we'll put in the show notes, a link to the comic book Junto episodes, where you guys tell your listeners and friends that way about what you were planning instead of going to see Shin Godzilla. Am I getting that right? We'll put that link in. And by the way, if you listen, and if you are like me, and you don't know squat about comic book culture, I would skip to about an hour and one minute.

Because there's a lot of news updates. There's a lot. There was a lot to talk. I would really lead with what I was, you know, like, I'm gonna go under have some surgery, but you guys It's led with all of the comic book news, which, you know, props. That's good. If I may, Michael, I just want to say, I don't want to pat myself on the back too hard, but I did, I did do this mission story slam and I managed to get this story out in less than five minutes.

The runtime includes me, you know, kind of BSing a little bit, um, but if you know anything about Octavius and I, we go long. And I just want to acknowledge my ability to moderate for the room. You understand? You're like, I'm, I, I know who's listening and I respect their time. So me on the other hand, so, well, we'll watch out.

We're going to watch out then. So, and actually Octavius, while you were getting your mic set up, um, we were looking. At the story. And Adam was like, I wonder how long it is without my opening about like, you know, talking about the burlesque stuff. So we looked and we moved it around and it was that. So it's supposed to be a five minute story.

He was like four 59. Woo. It's crazy. This guy. That's right. Doubted you. Yeah. A pro. So, um, so I get how the conversation came up. Okay. Let's go with the. and respect for what you all do. Let's go with the origin story. So you bring up what's your blood type, which by the way, I don't know my own, which I probably damn well should, but, uh, that happens.

And I know you guys like, tell me a little bit about the journey to get there. And then I'm going to get you and force you guys to answer my question about how you made a deal so that. Neither so there wasn't some kind of imbalance in your friendship, but how did you get from comic book Junto to October 11th hospital?

If I if I want to answer the question with because that's how we got there. I asked questions. I think the reason why comic book Junto works as a podcast is because a very major component of Octavius and my friendship is open curiosity. We just, we have a lot of questions about everything and we channel a lot of those questions.

through pop culture, through geek culture. And that's what we think. That's what we tout as being special about our show and our friendship. So when met with, you know, Octavius is finding out about his, his own diagnosis, he's asking questions about how to get from A to Z. And he shares this with me. And I was just very frank and I didn't know, I mean, like I know my blood type, but I don't know anything else.

And I think the thing that I shared with him that really kicked everything off is I said, could you, I asked, could you put me in contact with whoever you are talking to at Jefferson, at the hospital. And if you put me in contact, I'll have questions for them and we'll go from there. And so really, the time in between me finding out about his diagnosis and then October 11th, Shin Godzilla Day, it was just a series of questions and really the thing that has always been true about our relationship, which is being comfortable and curious and vulnerable.

And I mean, this was just like the ultimate vulnerability, talking about something like this. Is that kind of how you remember it, Octavius? Oh, yeah. Adam and I are going to talk. We're going to crack jokes. We're going to ask questions. We're going to debate. We're going to argue. We're going to disagree. But I think the biggest thing that makes all of that possible is trusting that the other person is doing it in love and true curiosity.

It's not in an attempt to catch you or get you. But there's a genuine trust that I have of Adam. Adam is, you know, this is uncle Adam to my kids. You know what I mean? I'm getting, see, that just activated some emotion. Yeah, it's kind of. Let me just get myself together. Cause that just shot the, shot the emotion through the body, but yeah.

We don't talk about this stuff in, in great detail. And you know, I think part of it is because we know we, we did it, we lived it. Like how often do you have to belabor the thing you already did? Right. We're not the type of people who live in the past, but. But, at the same time, I think both of us don't have a lot of practice, and so, like, I will get misty eyed talking about our friendship in my relationship with his family.

And it's part of the reason why I was nervous doing the Story Slam, not the least of which is having a lot of people hear this story, but because talking about it is You know, it's, it's very emotional. It's a very, it's a big part of my life, but not something that I just drop it. Yeah. You know, at, at any occasion, we all have that stuff, you know, but, um, you know, listen, guys, I, I would like to think that this, yes, this is a podcast that anyone can find and listen to.

Not sure how many find it and listen to it, but, you know, but, um, I do work really hard to keep this a safe space, mission story slam as a place to come and tell a story, a safe place. Like it really is. All about building community and some of that is through sharing about difficult things that we do when we're trying to do good, right?

Yeah, so, um, but I'm not asking you guys to bawl your eyes out if it happens, you know, you might end up with some tears on the windscreen. I understand what you're saying. We can cut it back. The algorithm loves that. So how, so I know I'm, I'm pushing on this, but I just want to know, like, was there a moment pre October 11th, post October 11th when you guys said like, okay, How, how are we going to factor this into our friendship?

Like when I chat with you in 2017, how are we going to have it? So that there's not an imbalance of like, Oh, you did this thing. And so now I owe you forever, ever. Was there, dude, I don't. No, I think we, we never spoke. I mean, we just, we never entered the conversation into anything that looks like or sounds like, or resembles a transaction.

We just never talked like that. It was just a thing that we were doing. I'm honestly, maybe this is part of the way that we became. Family, because family doesn't do that. You don't bring turkey to Thanksgiving and say, Hey, everybody, it's cost me a little over 100. Yeah. Yeah. Um, we never really spoke like that.

I will say, I don't know if I shared this with you, Octavius, but, um, two core memories related to this one is part of the serendipity of Thanksgiving. Why I started asking questions and saw myself within the, the possibility of, of being a donor is because I was a producer in a host of an event called Ignite Philly and, uh, at a recent Ignite Philly, some weeks or months prior to, uh, Octavius learning about his, his stage four, uh, someone talked about being a donor and so it was just in my mind, it was latent in my mind, whether I was thinking about it actively or not, it was there.

The seed was planted. At another Ignite Philly, after Octavius and I had started engaging in this, but before the actual transplant. Someone approached me, talking to me about the transplant, and that person told me a horror story. About how his relationship changed drastically with his mother, because he gave his kidney to his mom.

And things got out of balance. And I appreciated this person being open and vulnerable with me and sharing with me, but I could not see myself within that framework. I just, it didn't even, it, I did not clock that. I did not see how that could happen for Octavius and me. And to quote Octavius, maybe this is a gumbo of, you know, naivete and audacity, but it's just, it never became like that.

And I think. I think those are important conversations to have, and I wouldn't dissuade someone from having them. But, shout out to the Jefferson Hospital and their team. They do a lot of work to help out, you know, make sure that people have an understanding of what's involved psychologically, you know, all of that stuff.

I'll also say, there's an aspect of this that I remember people being very candid with Adam and going, You don't have to do this. You know, and I think Adam, you can kind of confirm or deny they, they damn near tried to talk you out of it for the sake of ensuring that you're sure that you're sure you had conversation with parents, conversations with friends, conversations with people at Jefferson.

It seemed like they did a very thorough job of going. You sure? You sure? You sure? You sure? You're sure? You sure? You're sure? You're sure? You know, you don't have to do it. You can do it. You can stop. You can stop like Adam. Collectively said yes. And one of the things that I see that as a blessing because I, from my perspective, from my family's perspective, we never had the feeling or the need to press or Or, or beg or plead.

It was very much Adam going, I shall return with an answer. , you know, and us watching. And part of it for me was, I didn't want to do that. I didn't want to, didn't, didn't want to pressure him. Okay, push, twist his arm, guilt trip. That's not the kind of person I am, nor do I feel like. Did I feel like that was necessary because I believe Adam.

Okay, when he says I'm gonna go consider it I believe him, you know when he says he had this conversation and we're talking and talking and talking through the whole process I believe what he says. So, reflecting back on it, I think it's a huge testament to the fact that this is Adam's choice. And something external from me acted upon him to convict him to say, yes, I'll do that for you.

And that's a blessing. You know what I mean? That's a blessing to me and my family. My kids literally wouldn't be here. I might not be here, you know? Right. That's a blessing from God to me, you know what I'm saying? Through Adam. So you finally answered my question. Which is, clearly you guys do not talk about things directly.

But you both are way, thinking about it in your own ways. Cause, I think the fact that, um, Octavius, that you could be, you know, an end stage kidney disease and not give anything. Anything but room and grace to Adam to do his research and make his decision like that actually puts the balance back Like I can see where the balance is in terms of how that how I gather the two of you operate in each other's lives So that's I finally maybe get it.

So I got a question for you. What just happened? Which would you prefer you for you Michael? What just happened in your mind emotions feelings thoughts? Sounds like you just had an epiphany seems like something just unlocked for you. Am I am I am I on point with that? Uh, I don't so Epiphanies. I give those pretty, uh, rare air.

I don't know if it, but I did kind of have, there's a dumb old phrase I like about the, the dime dropped going back to y'all. Y'all remember pay phones around on the corner. Yeah. And, and you know, when I was a tiny person, I think it was still dying. But anyway, um, it's just that clearly for me, that question mattered about like, how do you, I have friends that I consider family big time.

And you know, if I had, yeah. If I had an opportunity to do what Adam did for one of those friends, I mean, I'd have to be there to know where I'd end up on that journey, but I'd like to think that I would make the same choice, but I know that I would be worried about like, So if I was in Adam's position, I would be worried about the friend not feeling balance and Octavius, I guess if I was in your position, I would want to have a conversation about like, yo, I don't want everything to change between us.

So like, but I'm a, I talk about way too much stuff. Talk to anyone who knows me, they will tell me to shut the hell up. Yeah. So, so I think the epiphany was just like, okay, both of you have your own way. That you gave each other time and space and freedom. And so you didn't have to negotiate because there was nothing to negotiate.

It was just like, you go and do your thing. I'm going to go and do my thing. And if this works out, great. If it doesn't work out, great. Um, I don't know, but that is impressive. It says a lot about your friendship. I agree. So I agree because Adam did not, Adam, you did not have to do that. And we've said this before, but I'll say it again.

It genuinely is a blessing to me that you chose to do that. And I think it is a humongous gift for you to choose to do that. And that says a lot about your own personal convictions and who you are. Independent of me. You know what I'm saying? That speaks to who you are. And I think that's a big, big deal and I feel very blessed to have you as a friend.

But also, our relationship, keep in mind, did not start at a kidney transplant. Our relationship started with many long conversations about life, about comic books about geek culture, about friends, about family. So Adam and I were not strangers who met in the street and who were like, want to give me a kidney?

This is a person who I have spent hours, hundreds of hours, some recorded, many not recorded, talking. And we're probably all grateful for that. So when we get to a moment like this, this isn't like, Hey stranger, this is a person who we both invested in, watered each other and helped each other blossom and bloom, you know?

Do you guys, have you learned about sort of the live organ donor community? Like, have you either talked to, or just sort of started to understand what some other, like other, other, other people like you, because I would imagine that it's not too common that someone who's a. As close friend is actually a match.

I would think that's pretty rare. This is an interesting question. I, I will be very upfront and say, I struggle with being a part of that. If we want to call it a community. Um, I engage with it really sparingly as a, as somebody who sometimes takes MC gigs. I've been very fortunate that the, uh, Pennsylvania and New Jersey kidney foundation.

Uh, kidney donor foundation sometimes asks me to participate in events. I have hosted their annual galas, which is for the doctors, which is really special. The funders, the people who make that stuff happen. And I regularly host the, the, the Philadelphia kidney walk, which sometimes happens at citizen bank.

Um, most recently this past year at the Navy yard and. Those are the times when I get to engage with folks who are like me and very different from me, but people who are wrestling for the decision, people who have gone through this, people who have lost loved ones, people who have helped loved ones. Um, those are very overwhelming emotional days because otherwise I don't Um, this is, this is something that I alluded to in my, uh, my, my short story.

I just don't, I don't engage with it like that. I have a viewpoint about being a donor that really struggles with the hero worship idea and really struggles. Let me interrupt for one second. Yeah. I wasn't trying to do any hero worship on you. I was actually just curious if other, if other, um, friend couples happen like this.

Cause I would think that more often it's probably people you don't know or don't know that. Sure. More than anything. And you can finish your thought, dude. I just didn't want you to think I'm being all weird about it. No, no, no, no. More than anything, I'm trying to provide some table setting for how I've gotten to a kind of detachment from a group of people that maybe I ought to be better engaged with.

Um, I should know more about, um, But it's because I, you know, talking about the conversations we do and don't have just between Octavius and myself, I, I have similar monologues, uh, you know, just inner monologues about, you know, what am I supposed to do? What's my responsibility after being a donor? Should I talk more about it?

Should I connect with more people? And, um, I'm still uncertain because I struggle with figuring out what my role is within that. I don't want to be patted on the back, but I do want to talk about it because I think it's up. A really wonderful thing that people can do together, not as an individual, but that you do with other people.

It's, it's just like my work within Indy Hall, a coworking community. It's about being connected to the people that are around you, the environment that you are a part of. And I do know that something. like 100, 000 over 100, 000 people are on the donor list and need a kidney, uh, whether that's from a living donor or not.

Um, more often not is the case. And I think of that, maybe 125, 000 people every year, maybe only like 15, 000 people actually Get it. And so the, the tremendous need for people to have science for neighbors, for friends, for family, for loved ones, for just a better understanding, uh, to, to be able to survive in their lives and to see their next generation.

All of those things are just, it's unbelievable, um, and I, I have come to understand that Octavius and my friendship in our pairing, the cross match is special to answer your question because that is not always the case and it got, it's even wilder because in the time that it takes, it's a lot of time when you start asking questions and when the transplant happens, science continues developing and so they find ways to find an even better better match than possibly the one that we already had.

And I think that's a pretty unbelievable concept. You know, we had the conviction and just days before the surgery, they said, Hey, we could go through this testing again, just to make sure that everything is perfect. And that's very difficult because both of us. You know, I think we're fond of scientific developments.

We want to say, yeah, you know, use the best stuff. But at the same time, you've gotten so close on willpower, on faith, on love, on trust, that it's really hard to scrap it and redo it. So, um, I think more friends ought to ask about the possibility, but more so people just should look into themselves. Even when the possibility is not on the table, there's nobody's asking, you know, just thinking about your position as a human.

And what you can do for yourself and your community and people you've never met. Uh, I would say to anyone listening to this, you don't have to be a kidney donor, but you can give blood. You can think about it. You know, those kinds of things put you in a position where you are helping so many people around you, whether or not you know those people, or you know they need the help.

Everybody needs help. And, uh, I think about, um, the thing that we did is something that is genuinely good for me. Individually, not just for Octavius, because if I only thought about it as serving Octavius, then I would feel like there's some transacting or balance that is out of whack. It wasn't just for him.

It was for myself. It was for my world, my life. And that's, I think it's just a healthier way to think about it. It's not a IOU. Octavius, you referenced, you know, you've got a wife and two daughters. Like, I know you can't speak for her, but like, how's your wife's reaction or relationship with Adam? Did that change at all?

I don't think it changed. I think it is just strengthened, you know, I think, um, just like anybody else in my family, they go, how's Adam? My mom, how's Adam? You know, people are asking about Adam, like he's a family member, like he's somebody who they haven't seen in a while. Well, tell him I said, Merry Christmas.

Well, how's it, you know what I mean? Oh, he got engaged. That's amazing. You know, So it's similar with my wife. My wife cares about him like he's a family member, you know, and Full transparency, Adam and I are friends. So we don't always agree So when Adam and I don't agree my wife goes, oh wait, hold on a second.

Wait a minute. I just she has this joke She's like why I don't want to take his kidney away from you. And I'm like, babe, it's too late. I Got it. Now. It's mine You know, but you know, I think it's just strengthened The relationship. with Adam as a member of our community. Octavius's mom sends me mangoes, uh, from Florida.

That's, you may not know, but that means something. That means something. And also she sends me instructions for how to cut mangoes because I'm white. So, uh, you know, I do appreciate that. But, but every time? Every single time? Uh, no, I think, hopefully she thinks or knows that I got it by now. Like eventually you learn how to do it.

Um, I like that I can kind of picture a mango. No, not fully kidney shaped, but sort of similar. Yeah, it is a little kidney shaped to be honest. A little bit. Yeah, it depends on how messy you want to get. You know what I mean? You can bite right into it or you can, you know, slice it up. I wouldn't bite into a kid.

I'm not really into kidney. Yeah, I'm saying like it all depends on what you want to do with a kidney. That's right. Favorite thing I learned from that podcast you guys did. Tell me about how many kidneys y'all have because I know pretty confidently that Adam has one but tell me a little fact that blows my mind.

I actually have three kidneys. That's crazy. One of them works. So are the, are the two that we're going through, that were in disease or are disease, like are they, do they do anything? Do they bring anything to the party or is it just a bad idea to do extra surgery of removing them? I believe in light of what Adam was saying about technology and finding out what works, what they found is.

From my understanding, the best thing to do is to add a kidney rather than take out and replace and so on and so forth. So, like, the kidney that I have is not where my other kidneys are. Well, I mean, there's, that space is taken. Yeah, see, it's taken. Um, so, yeah, that's basically, that's the big picture of what I understand it to be.

Essentially, I have three kidneys, one works, and that's because that's the best way they found to make it work. Octavius is like my pop pop and he's got three cars in the garage and only one of them runs. It is. Exactly. I mean, look. You know, I, obviously there's risk of an organ rejecting and it would make, it makes sense if you can hook a third guy into the line, that if something had gone South, at least you'd still have the same crap you started with.

More kidneys make light work, is what they're trying to say. I want to say too, you know, um, the, the, uh, procedure is interesting. It's a laparoscopic for me, for the donor and And so it's a very interesting, we have all of this on film. Oh, good. We like, please do not send it to me. It's pretty wild and it's laparoscopic for me.

It's pretty intense, but, but the healing is better, easier and faster for me. For the donor, it's a much more intensive procedure to. get things in there. And so you wouldn't want to duplicate the intensity to also pull things out. It would be like prolonging the procedure or making it even more difficult when you don't need to.

Uh, what's interesting though, is even though Octavius had a longer recovery period, I mean, there's a lot of work that goes into it. I, I, I believe I recall, I mean, Octavius, you felt like a new man as soon as the procedure was over. Like you felt totally different. Absolutely. You don't realize how, how much it's impacting you until you start feeling differently, you start feeling better.

Yeah. So it was definitely a huge change for sure. For people that want to take that deeper dive and check out that episode that we'll put in the show notes, like. Part of your story Octavius that really kind of blew me away or maybe it didn't blow me Here's what it did It made me stop and really think about my own health or being aware of my health is the fact that you had been going Through a long period of just like getting super fit and then all of a sudden Like you weren't expecting anything, but maybe a cold and then this is what you got Isn't that kind of how it went?

That's exactly right. Yeah, I had gone on a very big journey of getting very fit And the kidney transplant was a definitely a pothole, you know, for sure. It's just not something that you see happening coming. And that's one of the things that I share with people that I have relationships with, which was like, Hey, you should definitely go and get checked.

You should definitely ask questions when your doctors say, ah, well, you're kidding. Kidney numbers are a little high. Wait, wait, wait, hold up, doc. Hold up. What's that mean? Yeah, tell me more. Let's go get some testing. Let's go figure that out So you you really don't know what's going on Unless you look and ask and get tested and as much as you may think you can feel whether or not you are Well, sometimes your feelings alone May not do the most thorough job.

There's more stuff that you can do to figure out in detail what's going on One thing is I really What was really powerful in your story was how much pushback you got from your own family. In the lead up to, uh, going through this procedure, how is your family now? How do they feel engaged or connected to Octavius or do they?

It's the very same. They have my, my family, my mom, my dad, my brother, and my sister. They always ask about Octavius. How's Octavius? How's Alexis? How's people? How are people doing? My dad is constantly accidentally calling his Alexa Alexis. He's. He's constantly got Alexis on the mind. They, you know, they, they're always asking and I want to contextualize something or clarify something outside of my five minute story is, you know, my, I, my family didn't necessarily give pushback, but they were not ready.

I had thrown something at them that they've never. heard of, never contemplated, never imagined, and it caused me to understand that we had gotten to an impasse where we had floated away from one another in a way that families naturally do, and I never even thought about it. I had taken for granted the distance, physical, emotional, psychic, everything, and this was such a a moment when, when I had to connect with him in a way that I, I, I don't think I ever had.

I never thought I had to. And we had a lot of really difficult conversations. And I remember one of the most difficult conversations was with my brother. We went out to a bar in Old City, here in Philly. We sat down, and he asked, Who is Octavius? And I was like, Oh, wow. Because when he asked me who is Octavius, he wasn't asking, who is this person?

He was, he was asking, who is this person to you? And, and, and who are you? And it, you know, my brother and I are close enough in age that we can stay up with one another and talk a lot, but we clearly had not been. And this, I think, is It's normal, you know, not how many of your best friends or people you hang with or work with or whatever do your mom and dad and aunts and uncles?

No, really, probably not many. And, um, you know, now Octavius and Alexis and Zuri and Zinga, these are extended family members. I mean, they're really the best. These are family members. I remember Octavius, y'all came over for Christmas at my mom and dad's house. And that was like a profound experience for me after all of that, that was really incredible for you to be in the house where I grew up with my mom and dad and, and seated at the dinner table with us, you know, and, and even though we're not doing that every single year, who, who has the ability to make all those moves that combine families like that is tough.

Um, that's, you know, we're always at the dinner table together, you know. You guys are going to need to make some special plans, though, for October 11th, 26. That's not a bad idea. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That 10 year anniversary. I will say, and I don't want to be a downer here, but I will say, one of those special plans is talking about what comes next, because a kidney doesn't last forever.

And so, a donated kidney, uh, you know, there will likely be another one. And there's any, any question about, uh, how long will the, the kidney that I gave to Octavius last. And so there's gotta be a kind of a renewed conversation of now, now what? I assume you're just going to give him your other kidney. Well, you know, I got my eye on a few people's kidneys.

You know what I mean? That's right. Mike, by the way, what blood type are you? As I said earlier, no clue. I'll get back to you on a defense mechanism. Uh, no, I'm literally to have no recollection. I think in elementary school we tested it once and I don't remember. Do you find that life is different, more precious?

Do you approach it differently? Being on. On this side of that transplant, um, as far as different, I think that what it really does is it allows you to realize that you are mortal. I think everyone has a general understanding of that, but when you have something that externally happens to you that you can't do anything about, it really helps you see.

Your space or has helped me see where I sit in the eternity of it all, you know, like how fragile, how, how frail I am. And no matter how hard I work, no matter how much I do one, I understand that I am a finite being in a more intimate way to, there are some things that I cannot handle without the help of others, friends, family.

And there are some things that are purely dependent upon the kindness and the conviction of other people. So going through a situation like this, reflecting back on it, and then looking forward, I have a lot more empathy for when people are struggling with things, when people are having a hard time, when things are difficult, when things aren't going your way.

Um, you know, I'm a person who's very opinionated, has a lot of points of view and perspectives. And I think earlier on in my life. Empathy was something that I struggled with, but going through this, and of course being married, of course having kids, of course having daughters, you know what I mean?

Combined with having to take medicine all the time, combined with doctor's appointments, and, and, and, and, it has helped me to be able to go, oh I understand what you're going through. When someone else says something, it's like, oh, that sounds normal to me, or, oh, I relate to you in a way that before, I think maybe sometimes you have head knowledge of something, you know, you have knowledge, you have understanding, now I have a level of like wisdom to be able to go, ah.

I see, I understand, I can relate in a new way that has activated empathy in me for other folks that may be going through something adjacent or not even similar, but I just have my own personal experiences that I can call on, that I can pull out of my mental, you know, Rolodex and go, I can imagine what that feels like.

So that's a big piece for me that has come from this situation and moving forward. Empathy. It's the difference between thinking about what it's like to stand at the top of a cliff versus standing at the top of a cliff and seeing your relationship to you and the bottom of the cliff. You know, it's a body awareness.

It's like a spiritual awareness. You can think about what it's like to be up there, but it's a very different thing to experience it. And I think, you know, you can never unexperienced that. We're thinking the theme for Mission Story Slam 12 is going to be the time is now we're looking at June of 25 So you got you got a few minutes to think about it.

The time is now For us to bring this to a close. So do me a favor. What's the easiest way for people to Find you online. Where are you hanging out on all social media? I am at Octavius a Newman So that's Instagram. That's threads. That's, you know, all the places. Um, my let's just spell it just to make sure people get a V as in Victor.

I u s a n e w m a n Octavius a Newman on the various socials. Um, got a place where I am also a filmmaker. So the place where you can find the products that I do is heavyweight dot com h b y w t. And coming in 2020, someone stole your vowels. Yeah, they took them now straight up. Now, look what I'm left with.

Three kids. Sorry. So, all right. You were saying what you got coming up. We're going to be doing some new storytelling, uh, slash commentary on movies, TV, geek culture, and fandom through Krakum. So that's going to be on, um, YouTube and all the various places. So Adam and I will be back again, running our mouth about all of the things that we love and don't.

That's right. And Krakum is K R A K O O M. And we know in comic book parlance in onomatopoeia, like, you know, the biff wham pal Krakum is the biggest explosion, the biggest it was sent from the celestial cosmic and landed into the earth. And Krakum is the big. Like bursts of energy. So it's, I'm, I'm excited about that, but I feel like we, we, we got to do a little bit of a, uh, service journalism by teaching people the vocabulary.

And well played. That's a good definition. I, yeah, I now understand what crack. Uh, Adam, where do we follow you besides walking into Indy hall so that we can find out when crack coons, please do walk into Indy hall. Indy hall is Philadelphia's first and longest running coworking community. You can find us at Indy hall.

O R G, and you can follow me mostly on Instagram. I have a fraught relationship with social media, but on Instagram Wow, thanks and thanks has two s's. Wow. Thanks, and you can catch them on Twitch playing video games. Yes Yeah, from time to time. Yeah. All right. Well, thanks for bringing all of your body parts into the room.

You guys go and do what you're going to do. This has been an awful lot of fun for me, so I really appreciate the time. Thanks for the pleasure. Thank you for having me. That was definitely a very different conversation from the Mission StorySlam podcast. It was a lot of fun having two close friends who also podcast on the show.

Uh, definitely a new vibe, but something that I'm looking forward to listening to when this episode comes out. I don't know if you've got one kidney or three, but regardless, I do hope you'll come out and join us when we have Mission Story Slam 12. We're looking at June 25, exact date we're not sure of, but I will lay you money.

It'll be on a Tuesday and I can promise you we will be back at National Mechanics. We absolutely love that bar. So the Mission Story Slam podcast is produced by Dave Winston and he even cut today's episode. Pod is produced and brought to you by PWP video. We are video with a mission. You can find us at pwpvideo.

com. I shall remain Michael Schweizer. And I look forward to sharing the next story behind the story with you soon.